Completely Biased

So this book has been out there for quite a long time, but hey, a good book once is usually a good book all the time right?

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People (Paperback)

If you buy on Amazon.com the prices start as low as $0.01 not including shipping.

Personally I love this book, and it’s a good one to read again and again or whenver you feel your focus slipping or if you feel overwhelmed by all the responisibilities in your life.

Here is the overview from Amazon.com:

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change was a groundbreaker when it was first published in 1990, and it continues to be a business bestseller with more than 10 million copies sold. Stephen Covey, an internationally respected leadership authority, realizes that true success encompasses a balance of personal and professional effectiveness, so this book is a manual for performing better in both arenas. His anecdotes are as frequently from family situations as from business challenges.

Before you can adopt the seven habits, you’ll need to accomplish what Covey calls a “paradigm shift”–a change in perception and interpretation of how the world works. Covey takes you through this change, which affects how you perceive and act regarding productivity, time management, positive thinking, developing your “proactive muscles” (acting with initiative rather than reacting), and much more.

This isn’t a quick-tips-start-tomorrow kind of book. The concepts are sometimes intricate, and you’ll want to study this book, not skim it. When you finish, you’ll probably have Post-it notes or hand-written annotations in every chapter, and you’ll feel like you’ve taken a powerful seminar by Covey. –Joan Price

If anyone else has read this book, please feel free to post a review in the comments!

I realize that I’ve been writing about the present but never my past. I guess I imagined this blog as being a ”living in the present” type of feature. Except now I am starting to realize just how much your past can influence your future.  

I’ve always had a tendency to have men from my past stick around.  It’s like after we stop dating they suddenly realize that we were meant to be together. Anyway, a few years ago I dated a man, let’s call him Mr. Bling. We dated for a few months and were pretty smitten with each other. It was a fun few months especially aided by the fact that we lived a few miles from each other. Mr. Bling was the guy who took me to expensive dinners, paid for nights out filled with dancing, and when we stayed in he would cook for me and basically treat me like a princess.

It was a little disconcerting that a man could treat me so good initially. Then right when I just started to enjoy it, my gut started to override that feeling. I knew something was wrong, but I could not for the life of me put my finger on it. He was acting funny one night when I had gone over to his place and I could tell there was something really off. After a little bit of persistent questioning, I found the truth. He told me his ex-girlfriend wanted him back. He didn’t say he was going to get back together with her just that she had been calling him repeatedly. I ended it right then and there. Baggage-I’m so averse to it, I hate it. I don’t want to deal with it and when it shows up I leave.

We had the infamous “final goodbye” at a local Starbucks on a rainy, autumn night.We didn’t talk for a few months after that. He held my clothes hostage for a while and kept texting and called occasionally.  I thought it was done, but he hung on. Eventually a phone friendship resumed and then it was followed by the “let’s hangout” and then it rolled into, well basically, a mutually beneficial friendship. No committments, no strings, just good times which occasionally involve some intimacy.

More to Follow.

Leah and I have spent many an evening with a bottle or two or wine. We have commented before on the bottle having traditional or synthetic corkage and as I remember, attributing a value to the different kinds. As though the very existence of a traditional cork makes the wine more refined or better. I believe this is something many people do. We like to write off the quality or value of a wine on the packaging (e.g. cork). However there is something that the type of cork can do to a wine to effect its flavor and quality.

In one of our recent episodes Leah commented directly on the cork imparting a damp flavor to the wine. I noted it and filed it away for later. Today I took to Google to see what the all seeing oracle had to say on the subject. It turns out that anywhere from 1-15% of wine produced can become tainted by the cork and only in cases where traditional wine corks are used. The cause of the contamination is fungus from the cork seeping into the wine. It’s something that is tough to track too. So vineyards and bottling companies use what they have because they don’t want to be viewed as inferior by using a product consumer’s view with a negative light. Imagine buying a good aging wine, stowing it away for a few years and returning to find a distasteful mess when corked and tasted. However by using a synthetic cork (or closure as they are called) you can get around all that mess, better yet they fit standard bottles and you can avoid the very low class “Screw-tops”

In short, don’t pass judgment on a modest bottle of wine with a synthetic cork. If it’s keeping the air out and not putting the fungus in you should be happy! Let the wine do the talking!

For more details check out this article on MSNBC Food.

(Image courtesy of Northern Brewer the online home brew supply store.)

Is it ever ok to break up via text message? How about post it note? In today’s dating world where relationships last shorter than a pilot of a bad sitcom, have breakup rules been redefined? Leah and Josh along with guest hosts Sukanya and Sayeda return to Completely Biased and go head to head how they’ve approached breakups, their worst breakup stories while Josh interjects the occasional male opinion. Comedy and drama ensues.

Get it here!

Some people wonder what the secret to a successful relationship is. There are a million people out there willing to offer up the advice that it’s compromise, love, that mystery soulmate factor, etc. Well here’s one more speculative piece of advice that you can add to your million that you’ve already heard.

No one is to blame. There is nothing you can do.
That’s right. Remember that. As we go through life, people have a natural tendency to do two things when things go wrong: figure out whose fault it is and figure out how to fix it. Though this might be absolutely brilliant in your career as a business analyst or consultant, it will be the downfall of your romantic life.

You see, today’s society teaches us that we have to face each problem by covering our own butts, trying to figure out who the scapegoat should be and then coming up with a pretty little packaged solution that hopefully makes the pesky problem go away. But in most organizations you have to heavily masquerade this mentality or it’ll do to the organization what it would do to any relationship: corrode.

I believe to make a successful couple you have to be able to accept that there might not be anyone to blame for a particular problem and that there might never be anything you can do about it. Like the thermostat wars. It’s no one’s fault that one person is too hot or too cold. Or like the difficult in-laws. It’s not your partner’s fault that they have a crazy relative, nor can your partner make that relative stop being crazy.

Now that you understand that part, let’s move onto a novel and somewhat underutilized mentality that might save many relationships.

Before blaming someone else, blame yourself. Before expecting someone else to solve something, solve it yourself.

Yes, this does mean that before you go bellowing out at your partner, perhaps you should think of whether or not you’re responsible for something that has happened. As hard as it is to believe, you are not a wimp or getting walked all over if you take the blame for your half of the problem. Though, it’s important to note, that it might be shocking for you to understand that you might have something to do with the problem.

Keep in mind that even if you have nothing to do with the problem, if it doesn’t matter whose fault it is and there is a way for you to solve it and prevent it from happening again, you can do it. And sometimes, though the concept sounds blasphemous, it’s ok for you to change if it’s not that big of a deal to you.

Of course, these solutions only work if both parties in a relationship are willing to try them out. Because if only one side is going to be gracious, the other one should just take a hike.

(Images courtesy of Catherine Jo Morgan - Art for Energy(tm))

Many people believe that they have certain rights that should not be infringed upon, but what about the rights not specifically stated? Leah, Josh, and myself had already had debates of the subject that if a right is not denied, then it is reserved to the people. Reading over Slashdot, I came across a story about two individuals arrested for taking photographs (or video recordings) of police activity.

The first man, Micheal Gannon was arrested because his security cameras caught an investigator in New Hampshire trying to abuse his power as an investigator. Their son was under investigation for a mugging at a restaurant, and a charge for possessing a handgun that was stolen in Vermont. The son wasn’t home, but the police had six officers outside his door. Apparently after Mr. Gannon asked the investigator to leave, the investigator continued to assert his authority past the line and into ‘abuse’. At some point during this incident Mr. Gannon did warn the police that there were video cameras on the property.

Now to add further injury, we should look at why the Gannons have these security measures. At one point, someone broke and entered their home, and proceeded to assault Mr. Gannon. Later, an individual broke into their camper that was on their property. The worst thing about this? The police responded with a “maybe you’re too rich for the neighborhood.” Who in Law Enforcement would EVER say something like that? The role of Law Enforcement is not to put the blame of what others did to the Gannons on the Gannons, but to ensure that it doesn’t happen again.

If you happen to be interested in seeing the charges/complaints by the police department there is a PDF (Acrobat Reader Required) with a scan of the charges/complaints/testaments.

Moving on to the second issue involves a Mr. Cruz. Mr. Cruz was at his home when he heard a commotion outside of his home and walked to the back door to see a line of Police vehicles on the street. He opened his phone and took a picture. After a bit, an officer went to his backyard gate and opened it, arresting Mr. Cruz. It is reported the officer said, “You should have just went in the house and minded your own business instead of trying to take pictures off your picture phone.” Again, what officer would EVER say something like this?

According to NBC10, the police were threatening to charge him with conspiracy, impeding an investigation, and obstruction of an investigation! In this report, there is no statement that he took a picture of the actual arrest, showing the suspect. So why would this be a problem? This issue of course is more outrageous that the first, however these are all an issue.

Why are our police officers asserting their authority to the point where they abuse it? Why do we have to defend ourselves and our rights from the police? Many people know that I intend to get into that field, however, it’s news stories like these that give the honest police officers trouble. There is absolutely no excuse for arresting someone for something reasonable! This is just as bad, if not worse than the F.A.M.A. disaster that is happening right now!

I suggest people research their rights, protect them, and use them.

Why shouldn’t you be part of interoffice romances?  Because loose lips sink careers?  Dear Prudence says, don’t quit. 

When Harry Met Sally rear’s its head again when a girl writes to Dear Sugar about how to take things back to the way they used to be. 

Stingy mingy ways?  Get your mind out of the gutter.  Dear Abby addresses a middle age daughters issues with her distant mother.  She also talks about what to do with a guy who doesn’t want kids.

Is it a friend’s job to voice her opinions on a doomed relationship?  Dear Julie addresses this question with a homosexual twist.

Dear Margo tells a woman what to do with her husband who is obsessed with playing video games, watching tv and neglects his family after being rather patient with a guy who revealed his wife’s indecent pictures at a guy’s only weekend.

When does common sense get confused with jealousy?  Dear Sugar talks about a ridiculous situation of a woman’s sister flirting with the woman’s husband and Dear Abby addresses a man whose girlfriend goes away for weekends alone with other men. 

Most single mothers worry that their beaus’ won’t like their child, what do you do when you have the opposite problem?  Dear Abby says watch out.

California’s heatwave is driving me insane.  Sure, I can hop in the pool to escape from the sweltering heat, but what about my delicious bottles of syrah?  How am I going to prevent the heat from turning what would be a symphony of scents and flovers into an offensive assault on my mouth?  A wine cellar you say?  Great idea.

But what about space?  How ever will I have room for a wine cellar?  A tabletop cellar?  Do tell.

Danby Black 17-Bottle Wine Cooler $99.99

A tabletop wine cellar for less than $100?  And if you spend a total of $125 in kitchen and housewares you get $25 off your order.  It’s like getting a free set of Reidel glasses.

Don’t confuse this model with the Haier wine cellars that are notorious for being too large for too little storage and for plain simply not working.

Storage for 17 bottles isn’t enough you say?  You enophile you.  Unfortunately, I can’t in good conscience recommend any cellars beyond the 17 bottle mark because they seem to have habit of not keeping stable temperatures throughout the cooler.  If you’re on the market to find your own larger cooler though, keep in mind a few key things.

1. Temperature control:  Wine needs a constant temperature to mature properly. The optimum tempertaure is 50 to 55 degrees farenheit.  Some people say that any constant temperature between 40-65 degreeds farenheit will do.  Good temperatures to chill wine at are as follows:

Red wine: 55-60°F / 12.7-15.5°C
White wine: 49-56°F / 9.5-13.3°C
Rosé wine: 49-51°F / 9.5-10.5°C

2. Humidity: Moderate humidity at around 70% is ideal to keep the corks in good condition.  Drop anywhere below 50% and you risk the corks drying out and letting air into your bottles.

3. Light:  If you’re going to be keeping your cellar in a dark place, no worries.  But if you’re going to have your cellar holding your dear wine bottles in a lit area, make sure there is a UV filter.  LIght in general can cause a wine to mature too quickly and can give it an unpleasant smell.

4. Movement:  Wine doesn’t like vibrations or movement.  You should plan, once you set a bottle down for storage, not to have to move it again until you’re going to drink it. Make sure that the cellar, or the area that the cellar is stored in is not subject to vibrations because it will disturb the sediments in the wine which could ruin the bottle.

Why bother buying a cellar?  Why not build one yourself?

The Home Wine Cellar: A Complete Guide To Design And Construction (Hardcover) $22.50 

Oh right, that whole space issue.

I peruse a number of quality blogs including tomsaaristo who posts daily on foodie related topics.  Tom recently did a series of wine blogs that went something like this:

“On Wine: Buying

Buying a wine for dinner might not be one of life’s easier tasks. Fortunately, it doesn’t have to be that way. The fact is, even a small wine store can have hundreds of bottles and a large wine store can have thousands. So how do you get comfortable in a wine store?Three easy ways:First, choose a wine store where you feel really comfortable. Forget those places that are stuffy and make you feel like a dunce. Choose a wine shop where you can browse around and ask simple questions.

Second, shop in one section of the store for six months or so. Get to know the types of wines in that section really well before you move on. It doesn’t matter if it’s Bordeaux, Zinfandel, or Australian reds.

Finally, let food help you. If you’re making a spicy chicken dish, take that recipe with you. Find the clerk in the store who knows the most about food and ask for recommendations. You’ll be in for a really great bottle.

Wine shops are truly a lot of fun. So go out there and enjoy them!

On Wine: Cooking 

To some, a great cooking wine is a wine you drink when you’re cooking. But, of course, there are also wines that you need to add to a dish. So what are some considerations when you’re cooking with wine?First, never use a wine you wouldn’t drink yourself. If the wine doesn’t taste good, it’s certainly not going to add great flavors to the dish.Second, while you could use just white wine or red wine, try adding Port, Sherry, or Madera. All three of these wines are sensational and they pack a huge wallop of flavor.Port has a winey richness. It’s fabulous in beef stew.

Sherry has a complex, roasted nutty flavor that is great when you’re sautéing.

And Madera has a soft, nutty, caramel flavor that is fabulous when you’re just brazing meat or vegetables.

So remember: when you’re cooking with wine, make it count and make it sensational.

On Wine: Aging

Most of us age a wine for about as long as it takes to get it home from the supermarket. But is that a big mistake? Let’s say a friend gave you a bottle of wine for your birthday. Should you open it tonight or sequester it away for a few years?

The answer is: it depends.

The components in wine that allow it to age are sweetness, acidity, and tannin. A wine has to have one of those in fairly significant amounts if it’s going to withstand the test of time and actually taste better.

Sweetness is pretty easy to understand because most people have a jar of honey somewhere in their kitchen that’s been there for years. Sweet desert wines, like that jar of honey, last a really long time, even decades.

Wines like Champagne or German Rieslings that are crisp and have a lot of acidity also last a long period of time and still manage to taste fresh and lively.

And then there’s tannin. Wines like a Cabernet or Bordeaux that are high in tannin also age well over time because tannin is a preservative.

So if you want to put a wine away, it’s got to have either sweetness, acidity, or tannin.

If it doesn’t have one of these, you may as well just drink the wine tonight!

On Wine: Color

Most wine books advise you to look at a wine’s color before you taste. But what can you really tell about a wine from its color?Actually, two things: the color of a wine is a tip-off to its variety. Pinot Noir, for example, is always a light brick color, whereas Zinfandel is a dark, saturated, almost purple color.The color of a wine is also a tip-off to the wine’s age. All red wines get lighter as they get older and all white wines get darker.But here’s one thing you can never tell about a wine from its color, and it may surprise you: the intensity of the color is no indication of the intensity of the flavor.

It may be tempting to think of darker wine as richer and more flavorful than a lighter wine, but that’s not necessarily the case. The lighter wine well may prove to be the more flavorful.

In the end, you’ve got to taste a wine to tell anything about its flavor.

But of course, that’s the fun part anyway.”

The blog can be found here and Tom’s site full of wonderful recipes can be found here. The blog also includes some great gifs that we’ve featured in this post.